Prodigal Daughter
by carlycarter
Summary: Helen & Ashley, takes place after "Eulogy"
1. Chapter 1

_**Chapter 1**_

"Why do I get the distinct impression you're hiding something from me?" She asks.

_Because , _Will Zimmerman thinks to himself, _I am._

He shifts uncomfortably from one foot to the other under the scrutinising gaze of Helen Magnus. He feels almost violated as her calmly seeking eyes probe the depths of his troubled soul.

Opinion had been divided as to what, if anything, they were going to tell Magnus about the trip to Australia. Will remained torn. On one hand she had every right to know. On the other hand, he wanted to protect her. At this point in time it seemed the news would only bring her more pain. And so for the past week they had all kept their silence. The one thing everyone else had seemed certain about, was that if they were going to tell her everything, it would sound better coming from Will.

Whether Will agreed or not seemed irrelevant. Whether he had any intention of telling Magnus even one single thing about their trip, Magnus had ways of getting a person to say and do things they really didn't intend to do. Will had no doubt she would have the whole story out of him before the hour was over.

"You've been hiding something from me this past week, since you returned from Australia. All of you." It wasn't an accusation, just a statement of fact.

Yet Will feels the guilt rising, and finds himself uttering in his defence "We thought it was best."

Instantly he realises he has lost already. With those careless words he has admitted to her that, yes, they have all been keeping something from her.

"Deception is never for the best." She rebukes him gently. "The truth will reveal itself, it always does."

_That_, Will thinks to himself, _Is what I am afraid of. _

She smiles reassuringly at him. In 158 years of life she had seen an abundance of shocking things. What was he concealing that could possibly be so unspeakable? He was so young. So untainted. She had experienced more in her years than he could ever dream of.

She remains calm, composed. She isn't begging him to tell everything he knows. If she is hurt or frustrated about being kept in the dark this past week, she makes no sign of it. She is just standing there. Looking at him. Looking right through him with her penetrating gaze.

And that's all it takes to loosen his tongue.

"Something happened. In Australia." He begins.

"So I gathered."

"I don't know how to say this." He shakes his head, losing his nerve.

She sighs, losing patience. "Alright." She concedes, turning away from him.

It was an undeniable fact that Helen Magnus had not been the same since Ashley's death. No one had expected her to be. It never occurred to anyone that she might break. How many years had she lived through, how many heartbreaking scenarios? She survived. She was a survivor. A leader. They needed her to be. She was weary, but not broken. Helen Magnus had pushed aside the guilt and grief that threatened to overwhelm her. And she forced herself to live on, although she could never bring herself to truly let go.

And in return, they all turned a blind eye to her occasional lapses in concentration. Pretended not to notice that the light had faded from her eyes. Life went on. Magnus stepped up when she was needed, as always. She remained one of the most intelligent, compassionate, resourceful people that Will had ever known. But something was still missing. Something Will could never quite put his finger on.

Will knows it by the way Magnus stands there, turning away from him, from this secret. The old Magnus wouldn't have let him away with that so easily. Will thinks to himself that he could walk out of that room right in that moment, and never say another word about Australia, and she would just let it go. No questions asked. And Will is tempted to do it, to let the whole thing rest. But one thing stops him.

Will misses her, the old Magnus. The one who died that night right alongside Ashley.

Ashley who left such a massive hole in the place, a void that could never be filled. Not by Kate. Not by John's quest for revenge. Something had been taken from them all.

It is his desire to bring Magnus back to life that finally causes Will to swallow his reservations and utter the words. "We saw someone."

_**Two weeks prior**_

She is gasping for air as she runs through the streets of Adelaide. Telling herself she is seeing things. Telling herself she long ago left all that behind- The sanctuary, her heritage. She left it all behind and stepped into a normal life in South Australia. It had felt like acting at first. She felt displaced. Felt like an imposter, and that everyone who saw her would know instantly that she didn't belong. But running through those streets, fear coursing through her veins, with Will quickly gaining on her, she realised how thoroughly she had settled into role. There was no longer a single part of her that felt, or acted, like Ashley Magnus.

Because Ashley Magnus was afraid of nothing. And if Ashley Magnus _was_ afraid, she wouldn't turn and run. And if Ashley Magnus _did_ run, she could out run the best of them. She could have out run and outsmarted Will Zimmernam with her eyes closed and her hands tied behind her back. She had become lazy and complacent since living in Australia. She had stopped looking over her shoulder, stopped waiting for someone to find her. Stopped hunting for unexplained, unexpected things.

Finally she stops running, the need to breathe outweighing the need to escape. Within seconds he is upon her, grabbing her by the shoulders, holding her a few inches from his own face. His confused eyes search her own.

"Ashley?" He mumbles. "Ashley, is it really you?"

_No, _She wants to tell him. _No , It's not me. I'm not the same person you once knew. I'm not Ashley anymore. Leave me alone. _

But she makes no answer. Evidently Will finds something in her eyes. Behind her icy silent stare, he finds familiarity. He finds something that he recognises as 'Ashley'. And he pulls her into a tight embrace. Over and over again exclaiming "Ashley."

She pulls away from him finally, Acknowledging him with a slight nod. "Will."

There was little point playing dumb now. Little point in pretending she wasn't Ashley, pretending she didn't know who he was. She had run the second she laid eyes on him. But it was too late. He had seen her first, recognised her first. Playing dumb would only cause him to deduce she had been brainwashed. Only force him to drag her back to the sanctuary, back to her mother. To lock her up until they could turn her back into the person they wanted her to be. The person she used to be. That person was long gone. She knows she has to find some other way to convince Will to leave her alone, to convince him that the Ashley Magnus he knew is long gone.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

As she turns from Will's gaze, she realises for the first time that he is not alone.

Henry is staring at her too, with that same dumbfounded expression as Will. All anyone can seem to say is her name, and Henry utters it that same way Will does, in disbelief and wonder, and even the faintest trace of fear. _"Ashley."_

"They don't call me that anymore." She breaks the awkward silence.

No one asks what she is called now. It's inconsequential. She is Ashley. Always will be Ashley.

"They?" Will asks instead. "They who?"

She shakes her head. Overwhelmed. Confused. "People. Just the normal everyday people that live here. My name is Simmone now."

"What exactly are you doing here, Ashley, with these normal every day people?" Will asks it carefully, trying to understand. Not sure how much she remembers, although she clearly recognises him and Henry. He makes deliberate use of her proper name, Ashley.

"Just taking a walk. What are you doing here?" She turns the tables on them,"You're a long way from home." It was a poor choice of words and she hopes the others haven't heard the catch in her voice as she spoke the word '_home'_

"They mean, what the hell are you doing here, alive and well, when everyone back home seems to be under the mistaken impression you're dead." The woman standing beside Henry speaks up boldly.

Only this other woman seems calm. Only she seems as if her life hasn't been turned upside down. She is the only one with the courage to say aloud what everyone else is already thinking.

"They aren't mistaken. That Ashley is dead." She answers calmly.

"Since no one is going to introduce us, allow me, I'm Kate." She offers her hand.

As the blond accepts it, she realises she is standing face to face with the her replacement. The new Ashley. She can't help but wonder if Kate fits into her mothers life with that same apparent ease that she blends into the team. For a moment, she stops to wonders if she is missed in the slightest at the sanctuary. And even though she knows she can never go home, the thought that life at the sanctuary goes on without her, the thought that her mother had allowed this other girl to step in and take her place, causes her heart to stop beating for a moment.

"Well Simmone." Kate is the only only to use the new name, "Perhaps we could move this reunion some place more private."

It's not a totally stupid suggestion. Onlookers passing in the street are eyeing the group suspiciously.

She knows she has to go with them. Knows that they won't hesitate to take her by force if it comes down to it, to whatever 'private place' they had in mind, or heaven forbid drag her back to the sanctuary, back to her mother. So she nods in agreement, and follows willingly.

In the minutes it takes to reach the motel room, Henry and Will have already started mumbling about calling Magnus, who thankfully had not joined them on their expedition to South Australia.

"That would be extremely ill advised." She informs them.

"Ashley, she is your mother. She would want to know..." Will begins.

"To know what exactly?" She interrupts. "To know that the daughter she loved is dead? She already knows that. Just leave her be."

"I don't believe you." Will challenges. "You hide behind that fake name, hide away on another continent. But you can't run from who you are, Ashley, and you seem very much alive to me."

It irritates her that he persists in calling her '_Ashley_' when she has told him to stop. Irritates her that he thinks he knows her, thinks he understands her. "You think you're so smart, don't you Will? No, I'm not dead. Here I am, the same person I've always been. It's me, just me. You think I've been brainwashed? You think I've been damaged? You think you can drag me home and she can turn me back into the perfect daughter she always wanted me to be? No. This is me. Just me. _Me_ telling _you_, that I don't ever want to see _her _again."

"Do you have any idea how much your mother loves you? How much she misses you?" Henry asks.

"I don't care. Do you understand? I don't care!" She yells. "Go on then, call her. Bring her here. Let me tell her to her face how much I hate her, how I despise her, how everything that happened was her fault, how I would rather die than set foot in that place again. Go on then, do it, call her."

The others are shocked into momentary silence by the venom in her voice. Henry looks to her with a horror- filled, almost angry, expression. Even Kate looks mildly stunned. Will just stares blankly. His mind racing a million miles an hour. He isn't going to let it go that easily, and he doesn't believe a word of her angry outburst. He isn't sure why she is saying those things, but not one part of him believes them.

And still, they've reached an impasse. He pockets his phone. For the moment. Ashley has won. It's a long way from over, but she has won that first battle. Because whether he believes her words or not, It's certainly not something Magnus needs to hear right now. Not until he has got to the bottom of this. Ashley is right, there was little point in telling Magnus anything now. The joy at finding out her daughter was alive would be quickly overshadowed by that angry onslaught of hatred and blame. And even so, Magnus would stop at nothing. Ashley would become an obsession for her, one that would likely end up destroying them both in the process.

Will believes he can reach Ashley first. Somehow straighten this all out, so that when he finally did bring Ashley home, it would be the real Ashley. It would be the joyous occasion that it should be. Ironically it's Magnus herself that Will wants to seek advice from. The smartest, most insightful, person he knew. She would have known what to do, how to reach Ashley, how to figure out what had happened. Magnus would have been the perfect one for the job if she hadn't been so close. Telling Magnus now would be, as Ashley had informed him, extremely ill advised.

But Will also knows he is in over his head. That he is going to need help from someone. Someone clever, although not quite as clever as Magnus. Someone personally invested, although not quite as invested as Magnus, someone he could trust, although not quite as much as he trusted Magnus. Someone else who had a right to know Ashley was alive. In that moment Will decides that while he will keep Magnus in the dark a little longer, it's time to enlist the help of Ashley's father.

His thoughts are interrupted as Kate again breaks the silence . "So, just what are you doing here in the great south land, with all these 'normal every day people'?" Kate asks.

"I'm a school teacher." She finds herself answering.

That wasn't what the question meant, and she knows it. What they all want to know is how she got to Australia, how she survived, why she is living in hiding on the other side of the planet.

"Well, that's a far cry from your previous profession." Kate comments.

Something in Kate's expression angers her, and against her better judgement she allows herself to rise to the bait. "You look down on me, Kate? Think you're so far above me? I used to be you. I know better than anyone, It's not all it's cracked up to be. And there is nothing wrong with teaching. Teaching children is like holding the future of the world in your hands."

Will thinks that even though Kate is the one who has no real vested interest, somehow she is also the one making the most headway. Without even intending to, she is engaging Ashley in conversation, pushing her buttons. So Will stands, mutely and unobtrusively, listening. Holding his tongue even though he wants to say '_But Ashley, you don't even like children.' _

Henry however, is not so silent. "Just what do you teach these children, Ashley?" He wants to know. "To run? To hide? Do you teach them to turn away from their mothers, who loved them and raised them and gave them everything? Some future we have to look forward to."

His words are bitter and spiteful, almost cruel. She realises things have turned. They no longer look at her and see poor little dead Ashley who needs rescuing. Not poor brainwashed Ashley, or poor kidnapped Ashley. Henry looks to her in that moment and just sees selfish, spoiled, little brat Ashley. It's almost enough to make her want to defend herself. To tell them everything. But she holds her tongue, reminding herself its better this way. Let them hate her. Let the three of them hate her and leave her alone.

She feels vulnerable standing opposite them. She knows they are armed, and she has no weapon. She hasn't even any lingering abnormal abilities to fall back on. And while she knows they would never maliciously hurt her, she doesn't doubt they would go to extreme lengths to stop her running. She knows they are crazy enough, reckless enough, to take her back to the sanctuary by force if they decide they want to. She has no escape. She is outnumbered. Her only weapon is her words. The only thing in her favour is that she has shocked and confused them. She has no allies here. And while she may be able to dismiss the three of them, she knows she stands no chance against her mother.

She knows only one person who she can turn to, one person who can help her now. The one person she swore she would never ask anything from. Her father.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Chapter 3 **_

Kate Freelander tells herself it's coincidence that she is skulking around the warehouse where she knows they have stashed Ashley Magnus. Curiosity finally gets the better of her, and if she is honest, a little sting of jealousy. Just what is so great about this 'Ashley', or 'Simmone', or whatever she is calling herself these days, that has everyone else running around falling all over themselves?

"_Just what is the big deal about this girl?" Kate had asked Will _

"_That's Ashley." He had answered, as if that was supposed to explain everything._

_It was just a name. Sacred around these hallways it seemed, but just a name all the same. _

"_Well, 'Ashley' doesn't seem to want to be here." Kate had pointed out. _

"_Ashley is....not herself." Will had answered cryptically. _

Maybe that was true. Kate couldn't comment, she had never known Ashley.

She had heard the others whispering behind closed doors, and knows there is something going on that she isn't privy to. And she resents it. It was almost enough to send her running to Magnus and just freaking tell the woman that her kid was here. But there was a kind of bitter-sweet consolation in knowing she wasn't the only one in the dark. And an almost exciting anticipation waiting for the fireworks when Magnus figures out just how long they have been keeping this secret from her.

Kate remembers the blind fury that flashed across the eyes of Helen Magnus, the rage in her voice as she spoke the words. _"They have my daughter." _ It was the kind of fury fuelled by deep underlying devotion, by desperate fear. Beyond anything Kate had experienced in her own life. And it makes Kate want to know, _who would run from a mother like that? _

Kate feels a little sorry for the girl, almost, being kidnapped against her will. Kate had been the one to knock her unconscious in Australia. Without her, Will and Henry would still be standing on that street corner pleading with the girl. Kate could see in their eyes, they would not have walked away and left her, neither would they have been able to drag her back forcibly.

Kate wonders just how long they intend to keep her here? It's not like they could make her _want _to be here. It was not like she'd been brainwashed or turned into some kind of monster killing machine, like the last time. The girl did not want to be here. Simple as that. There wasn't much point keeping her against her will, that was hardly going to ingratiate her. It seemed even more pointless since they were not even going to tell Magnus that her daughter was alive, that her daughter was here just around the corner from the sanctuary. It makes Kate wonder just what Will and Henry were hoping to achieve.

And then, as if Ashley were a child, Will had contacted her father. Kate overheard Will explaining to the man they had found his dead daughter, that he was reluctant to tell Magnus. Not yet. That he didn't want to hurt her, didn't want to get her hopes up. That he didn't know what to do. And so it had been decided, John Druitt would talk to her, somehow get through to her. As if she were a naughty disobedient little school girl, waiting for her father to come home and reprimand her.

Kate hides in the shadows watching as John Druitt approaches that warehouse. Through the window she sees the fear in Ashley's eyes as that door creaks open. A deep fear that defies all logic and sense. Did Ashley really think that anyone here was going to hurt her? They were each falling all over themselves as if she were a god. It makes Kate wonder if Ashley has lost the plot.

Kate waits for the outrage to cloud the girls eyes, waits for her to tell her father to get lost, as she had told Will, as she had told Henry. Waits for her to scream that she didn't want to be here, didn't want any part of this, waits for Ashley to demand to be set free.

But the fear dissolves instantly from her eyes as Ashley looks up and sees her father in the doorway. Far from angry outrage or even surprise, the look that crosses Ashley's face in that moment is more akin to smug relief.

"You..." Ashley says to her father, "...are late."


	4. Chapter 4

_**Chapter 4 **_

"It's a large continent, I'm sure you saw a great many people in your travels." Helen answers.

And even though she is participating in the conversation, she is answering him, even some what listening to him, Will feels like he is talking to himself. He feels alone. It's the way he's felt ever since Ashley died. Oddly, it's her disinterest in him and in his secret, that fuels his burning desire to tell her everything.

Will Zimmerman always thought it would feel so good to one day stand before Helen Magnus knowing something that she didn't know.

"_How did you know that?" He had asked Magnus one too many times._

_Ashley had answered him, "Are you serious? She knows when you switched from boxers to briefs, man." _

Will found it extremely unnerving at the time. At the time when he still thought he was the smart one. That he was the one who knew all there was to know. How quickly Helen Magnus had put him in his place. Opened up an entire new world before his eyes.

"_That's impossible." He had protested more than once._

_Magnus had almost laughed at him. "Will, look around you." She had said to him. _

Will realises that he has never stood before her, knowing something that she didn't already know. And far from victorious, It feels un-natural. It feels almost frightening, like the world he knows is falling apart around him.

Will knows that the length of time that goes by keeping her in the dark, is directly proportional to the intense seething wrath of Magnus that is going to fall directly upon his head when she does find out he has kept this from her.

Still, Will hesitates. Ashley's words of warning ring in his head. And he knows he should probably wait. He should probably let John talk to Ashley first, to try to get through to her, to figure this whole thing out. But keeping this secret was eating him alive.

The words did not come easily. He was tempted to say nothing, to merely take her to the warehouse and show her. But he felt he owed it to her to prepare her somewhat.

Finally, Will Zimmerman takes a deep breath, and utters the words. "We saw Ashley."

Will is not sure what he expected. Not surprise, because Magnus had never believed Ashley was gone. She had been dreaming of the day that someone would come to her, telling her that Ashley is alive.

She stands perfectly still, her back turned to him. "I knew it." Was all she said.

When she turns to face him, a peaceful smile is creeping across her face.

"Where is she? Tell me. Everything." Magnus demands. Will can hear the anxiety creep into her voice, can almost see the thoughts turning over inside her head. _Where is Ashely? Is she alright? __Where has she been?_ Will can almost see Helen adding up the days in her head, the hours, the minutes, that Ashley had been gone. All that time that her little girl had been out there somewhere, lost and alone.

"She came back with us. She is here." Will answers. "Not here in the sanctuary, but close." Will explains.

Will, doesn't know how to tell her 'everything'. Doesn't know how to say '_Ashley is fine. She is alive and breathing, She is a person, not an evil abnormal killing machine. So, yes she is alright. But she is angry, so very angry. And she doesn't want to be here, and she doesn't want to see you, and we dragged her literally kicking and screaming back from Australia. And I don't want to tell you that, because all you want is your daughter run into your arms.'_

Thankfully, Helen doesn't ask. All she asks of Will is, "Take me to my daughter. " She doesn't ask how it was possible, doesn't ask what Ashley was doing in Australia, or how they found her. She doesn't ask because in that moment she doesn't care. All that matters is that Ashley has come home. Whatever problems they may encounter, Magnus is confident she can resolve them. She was always the one with the impossible faith that, somehow, every thing would work itself out.

Will stands, watching her. Watching as the life literally returns to her eyes. That spark of passion that had been missing for so long. At last, she seemed to be the woman he had first met. Strong, and full of fire.

"Take me to her." Magnus raises her voice impatiently, shaking him by the shoulders, breaking his train of thought. "Take me to my daughter!" Her impatience if fast turning to anger. Anger and fear. Because she doesn't understand why he is hesitating, why he is being so evasive. And it sits as uncomfortably with her as it does with him, that he is the one in control.

Will moves carefully down the corridors, and Magnus follows without question. He turns over his shoulder and finally warns her "Magnus, there is something you should know."

Will isn't even sure how he will finish that sentence. He just feels that he can't lead her to Ashley without preparing her. He is fairly certain this is the last thing she is expecting. Maybe she is expecting her loving daughter to run into her arms. Or maybe she is even expecting some violent monster, someone so completely 'not-Ashley' that she could miraculously break through to. But Will knows she isn't expecting the onslaught of rage and blame Ashley feels towards her mother. He isn't sure that even Magnus can break through all that. "Ashley is not herself." Will finally finishes carefully.

Helen says nothing. Just shakes her head, smiling. They were words she had heard before. _'She's not Ashley anymore.' _Will had told her. They had all told her. Told her Ashley was lost forever, Ashley was unreachable. And Yet Helen had reached her. Reached deep inside that monster veneer and found her little girl. Her little girl who turned to her with frightened eyes and a trembling voice, and said _"Mum?"_

Not one among them quite believed Helen Magnus and her account of events. Though no one openly challenged her. It made little difference in the end. Why take away her source of solace, her belief that she had reached Ashley in those final moments. Let her cling to her delusion if it brought her peace. Only now that Will has seen Ashley in the flesh, only now that he has looked deep into her eyes, does he start to believe that Magnus was right. Not only had she reached Ashley that day. But somehow Ashley had survived against all odds. Once again, Magnus had been right about everything. And Will thinks to himself that he ought to have learned that lesson by now.

So, Will isn't surprised when Magnus pays no attention to his words of warning. She shrugs them off along with all the other well intentioned words of advice concerning Ashley that people had tried to tell her long ago _"She isn't Ashley anymore." _ "_She'll kill us all._" "_Ashley is gone and she isn't coming back._" "_You have to let go."_ They had been wrong. All of them. Because Ashley had finally come home.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

No matter how many times she had imagined Ashley standing before her no matter how deeply she believed it with every part of her, Helen Magnus stops dead in her tracks, tears in her eyes, at the sight of her daughter living and breathing right in front of her.

"Ashley." Is the only word that escapes her mouth. Softly, almost a whisper.

Ashley takes a step backwards, leaving John standing between mother and daughter.

Will tries to control the situation. Tries to hold Magnus back, to get everyone to calm down. But Magnus won't be kept from her daughter by either man. Only Ashley's harsh words cause Helen to recoil. The venom in Ashley's voice turns Helen's blood to ice.

"Get away from me." Ashley orders her mother, as she takes another step back.

"Ashley its alright. It's me, mum." Helen tries to reassure her daughter. "You don't have to be afraid anymore. Neither one of us has to be afraid." Helen says calmly, confidently, reaching her hand towards her child. She is smiling, still reeling from the fact her daughter is home. The harsh words had slowed her, but not stopped her. Not crushed her. Not yet.

"You call yourself a mother?" Ashley asks her.

The words hurt. Excruciatingly. But Helen tells herself that it's not her daughter speaking. That they have done something to her. That just like before, she will be able to reach her child.

"What have they done to you?" Helen asks her daughter, sadly.

"What have _they_ done to me?" Ashley mocks her mother bitterly. "What about what you've done to me, Mother?"

The words are like arrows slicing straight through Helen's heart.

That's when Helen cant breathe. That's the moment that it sinks in. That's Ashley all right. Her very own daughter staring at her with so much hatred and blame. The guilt that has been threatening to suffocate her all these months suddenly comes crashing all around her. She is responsible for all the things that happened to Ashley. For everything that has ever happened to Ashley in Ashley's entire life. What kind of a mother has she ever been to the child?

Helen Magnus draws in a sharp breath, and sinks to her knees in despair. She is literally crumbling to pieces before their very eyes. All her resolve, her joy, her dreams, her confidence. Every last thing that makes Magnus 'Magnus' is wavering.

That's the moment something clicks in Will's head. Ashley's words had the exact desired effect – stopping Magnus in her tracks, like nothing he had ever seen. There must be a reason Ashley was behaving this way. He just couldn't figure out exactly what that reason was. He didn't believe for a second that she truly blamed Magnus for the things that happened. Magnus would have seen it too, if only she wasn't so hurt by Ashley's rejection. Magnus wasn't seeing things clearly, and it was left up to him to get to the bottom of this.

"Ashley." Will begins, not entirely sure how he will finish.

Ashley doesn't give him the chance. "I told you not to call me that!" She yells at him. "I told you that I did not want to come back here, that I did not ever want to see her again. So don't blame me for this, Will. So don't look at me like I'm the one who did this to her."

Helen Magnus can't help the tears that stream unashamedly down her face. Yes, that's her daughter. Passionate, angry, full of fire. Magnus thinks about Ashley, out there alive all this time. And it finally sinks in- Ashley had not been lost, nor kidnapped. She simply did not want to come back home. Ashley blamed her for everything. Her own daughter hated her. It was easy to believe. Easy to understand, because Helen had always blamed herself.

Helen Magnus finds herself almost drowning in self pity and condemnation. Yet it's still not enough to keep her from her daughter. Not enough to make her turn away. And one last time she calls her daughters name.

"Ashley." She begins pleadingly. "I'm so sorry." Helen knows she hasn't a single card left to play.

Ashley refuses to acknowledge her mother, on her knees, crying tears of remorse and desperation. She refuses to even turn and look at her. If she had done so, she wouldn't have recognised the sight before her eyes.

Instead, Ashley turns to her father. The two exchange an awkward glance.

"She kept me from you my entire life." Ashley reminds him.

There is hesitation written all over the man's face.

"You're the one who said you want to make it up to me. That if I ever needed anything you'd be there for me. This is the only thing I've ever asked of you." She continues.

"Ashley, you belong here, with your mother." He casts a gaze over his own shoulder to Magnus. Everything in him wants to reach out and take her pain away. But he knows he is not the one she wants, the one she needs.

"She kept me from you, for years, hid me away from you, You want to take her side now?" Ashley asks him.

Will sees it in his eyes, that John is carefully weighing up his loyalties, to Magnus, to his daughter, his own common sense. In the end, he is simply unable to resist the pleading eyes of his little girl. He knows she feels nothing like fatherly love for him. Knows she never has, never will. But he still can not resist her. Before Will realises, before he can scream no, In a flash, Ashley and her father are gone.


	6. Chapter 6

_**Chapter 6**_

Will finds Magnus in the first place he looks for her. Standing on the rooftop, staring out into the distance. It is eerily reminiscent of his first night at the sanctuary. He had found her standing much like this, at the very edge, and joked '_Don't do it, you've got your whole life ahead of you.' _Will doesn't make the same joke tonight, because he's afraid it might hit a little too close to home. Afraid that she is all too aware of the lengthy lonely years before her.

Will doesn't think he has ever seen her so lost. Not even when they believed Ashley had died. Not quite lost, more like faded. Weary. Almost, Will thinks to himself, old. For the first time Will looks at her without the slightest doubt about the 158 years pressing down upon her. It makes Will angry, at Ashley. For a moment he doesn't care anymore what reasons motivated the girl. It's beyond his comprehension that she could willingly cause her mother this much pain for any reason. Does she not understand how much her mother adores her? Will lets anger cloud his thoughts, because it feels good. Feels so much better than powerlessness. Good riddance to Ashley. They didn't need her. Magnus didn't need her. She'd lived for over a century without that girl in her life. Magnus would survive. She would get over it.

Will wonders if Magnus knows he is standing there watching her. Usually, as he stands in deep contemplation, thinking he has been undetected, she would startle him out of his thoughts. Not tonight, though. It is he who speaks first. And all he can think of to say is her name.

"Magnus?"

She does not answer. He steps toward her, realising just how close she is to the edge. She stands so still, so untouched, that he wonders if she has heard him and louder calls her name again, louder. "Magnus."

Will looks back over his shoulder, the others had scurried inside, leaving him alone once again. _'It's late, she wont come inside, she hasn't eaten all day. Go talk to her, isn't that what you do?'_

"Magnus, do you think you could step back away from the edge?" He asks her.

"Why " She answers him, keeping her gaze fixed into the distance.

"Because you're making me nervous." He tells her, and it's the truth.

He doesn't expect that his answer will go down well. He expects her to tell him to get over it or get lost. In far more eloquent words, no doubt. Expects her to tell him that she's been standing on rooftops for over a century, and it's not her fault that he is afraid of heights. Only it's not so much the heights he is afraid of tonight. He feels like he is intruding, on her place, her thoughts. And he waits for her to swing around and tell him so.

She does turn to look at him finally. She says nothing. She sees in his eyes genuine concern. Sees her own agony reflected as he looks to her. And she hasn't the inclination to fight him or push him away. He looks so small in that moment, his eyes so pleading. It causes her to nod in agreement. But she can't tear herself away from the calm night, the endless horizon. It's the only thing keeping her from going completely insane, staring out at the vast world and realising just how insignificant she truly is in the grand scheme of things. So, instead of stepping away as Will asked her to, she sits.

Will sighs, that is somewhat better he supposes. Not as easy to fall, to jump. Still it makes him dizzy watching her legs dangling over the edge, skirt billowing in the wind. She sits tall. Fearless. As he has always known her to be. And yet something in her eyes betrayed a deep terror.

She hasn't asked him to join her on the roofs edge this night. And yet hesitantly he steps forward, making a conscious effort not to look down. And uninvited though he is, he sits beside her.

They sit in uncomfortable silence. Will waiting for her anger to explode. For her to demand to know how long he had known about Ashley, where he had found her, why he had waited so long to tell her. But she sits calmly, gazing over the city, wordlessly.

Will feels the pressure to say something, anything. And so finally he utters quietly, but confidently "Ashley didn't mean that..."

"Don't will." She promptly cuts him off as if she doesn't want to hear it, as if she already knows what he was going to say. Which, being Helen Magnus, she probably does. Helen Magnus, knower of all things, so much wiser, smarter, than everyone else combined. Was he really going to sit here trying to tell her that he knew better than she? That she was hurt and in shock and not seeing clearly? Last time they had a conversation along those lines was after Ashely's _'death'._ How wrong he had been.

"That's why we didn't want to tell you." He begins to justify himself. It's important to him that she understands his motives for keeping his silence so long. Important that she knows it was to protect her and not for any malicious means.

"Don't." She warns him, more forcefully this time.

And silence prevails once again. It frightens him more than an angry outburst would have. Will knows he just can't sit here all night in this silence. She is slipping away from him, again. And he can't let it happen. He knows all that pain and anger is there, even though she isn't showing it. It's deep inside, turned inward on herself instead of out at Ashley, instead of out at him and the others. And he knows that if he leaves her alone, it will suffocate her.

"Don't you want to know where Ashley is?" He asks.

"Does it matter?" She asks him in return.

At first he doesn't quite understood what she means. Does she not care at all what happens to Ashley, doesn't she want to know Ashley is safe?

At the look in his eyes, Helen speaks again. "I'm sure she is better off where she is. She certainly believes so."

Will opens his mouth to say something. But he can't find the words. He thinks of Ashley, of _Simmone_, of the life she had built for herself on another continent. Of the trouble it caused dragging her away from that life and bringing her here. And for a moment he wonders if Helen is right.

But he thinks back to the Ashley he knew before, the Helen Magnus he knew before. He thinks to the first night he met Ashley, the unmistakable bond between her and Helen that he could not quite fathom. Thinks of the way they complimented each other as they worked together, forming the perfect team. He thinks of Helen trying so desperately to prove Ashley was alive, the hot tears that stung his own eyes as he watched her on powerlessly as she refused to let go.

This is all so wrong. It makes no sense to him. He understands that Magnus is hurt by Ashley's behaviour. But surely that wasn't enough to cause her to give up on her daughter? There was something else going on. Something Magnus wasn't telling him. Something that had happened between the two of them. He is dying to know what it is, but he knows better than to ask Magnus about it in that moment. And so he sits beside her, silently, staring out into the night.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Chapter 7**_

Back on Australian soil, Ashley stands face to face with the man who is supposedly her father. Part of her had never believed it. Not because he himself was such a shock, but because accepting the news that John Druitt was her father meant accepting that her mother had lied to her for her whole life. Even though Ashley had a fairly firm grasp that her mother had done it to protect her, it had still hurt like hell. Up until that moment Ashley had thought she and her mother shared everything.

It still sat uneasily that her mother had this entire life, a long long life, before Ashley had even existed. _'You are my life.' _Her mother had always told her. And the day she discovered John Druitt was her father, Ashley realised that was just another of her mothers lies.

"Ashley," The man speaks, reaching out his hand towards his daughter. He is looking down to her with fatherly love, expectation, disappointment.

"It's Simmone. And thanks for the ride, but it's time you were leaving." She tells him coldly. She wants nothing further from him, and has nothing left to give him. It was he who had come to her, telling her he wanted to make it up to her. Telling her that he would do anything for her. She had needed his help, and he had given it. That was the end of the arrangement as far as she was concerned. Now that she was safely back in Australia she had no further use for him.

"Ashley, the way you speak to your mother is unacceptable." He reprimands her sternly.

He is looking at her now, condemnation in his eyes. From him of all people. One of the most notorious serial killers of all time. And even he looks down at her, even he is judging her. It makes her sick.

"Seriously?" She asks him. "Seriously, you, jack the ripper, are going to stand there and lecture me?"

She remembered finding out that this killer was her father. It somehow made sense to her, because there had always been bloodthirsty darkness inside of her. Always been some part of her that her mother never understood.

And now even he is looking to her as if she were the criminal. She tries to shrug it off, why should she care what he thinks of her? But care she does. Because logic tells her that he, of all people, should understand.

Being a disappointment and a failure in the eyes of Helen Magnus was one thing. She was the great Helen Magnus after all. Was there anyone who could live up to her expectations? But here was Jack the ripper staring down at her as if she were the criminal. Her mothers disapproval hurt, because all she ever wanted was to please her mother. But this man, this so called father, standing here looking down on her, this makes her angry.

Ashley Magnus had always considered herself one of the 'good guys' fighting on the right side. She never harmed anyone who wasn't a threat to her or to others. But she had to admit, she enjoyed it, her work. A little too much sometimes. And she was good at it. She possessed a killer instinct that had come no doubt from her father. A wild ferocity that provided the perfect balance to her mothers gentle ways.

Her mother was far from fearless, but she was sometimes too trusting, to kind. '_Shoot first'_ had never been Helen's motto. And Ashley sensed the disapproval at times radiating from her mother at her reckless ways, at the ease with which she hunted and killed, the satisfaction it brought to her.

It caused Ashley to wonder just how her mother had managed to survive so many years without her. Ashley took pride in being her mothers protector. But it was that exact trait, that killer instinct, that the cabal had taken and turned into something diabolical. Something murderous. It had been Ashley herself who very nearly killed her mother, and the entire Sanctuary network, everything her mother worked for, everything her mother cherished. Ashley Magnus, protector of her mother, protector of the Sanctuary, was the very same person who almost destroyed everything.

Ashley remembers only disjointed fragments of the attack on the Sanctuary. As if it were a dream. She had no control over the things she did, she was not operating under her own free will. But the thrill of the fight, the flicker of excitement as the adrenalin coursed through her veins, that was something real. That was hers. Something familiar, something to cling to when everything else had been ripped from her grasp.

Ashley accepts responsibility for the events that night at the Sanctuary. Firstly because she was the one who allowed herself to fall into the enemy's hands in the first place. Her mother had not wanted her to go, had not believed that she and Henry could actually be successful. And she had been so desperate to prove her mother wrong. And secondly because she believes firmly that the Cabal could not turn any person into something that they are not. That blood lust had always existed inside of her. And it was that which allowed them to turn her into that killing monster.

The one clear memory of that night is of her mother. Helen Magnus standing there. Defenceless, having willingly dropped her weapon to the ground. Standing helpless opposite her daughter who had turned into a cold blooded, heartless monster, turned against the Sanctuary, remorselessly killing anyone who stood in her path. And there was Helen. Not threatening her in return, not defending her life time's work. Only standing there crying, pleading. There was Helen Magnus who thought she could win a war with kind words and understanding. It was weak and pathetic and it made Ashley Magnus sick to her stomach.

Had she been in control of her voice, Ashley would have screamed at her mother. _'Mom what the hell are you doing?! Don't you understand what is happening? Don't you understand you have to kill me, or you're going to die, you and everything you love. Stop crying and pick up your weapon and fight. Or at least turn and run like hell. Don't just stand there looking at me like that.'_ That was the moment the fog cleared. The moment Ashley found herself standing in her body, in control of her self once again. The horror of the things she had done, the things she had almost done, washing over her. Guilt and shame eating away at her from the inside out. She could not live with her actions, with the knowledge that she was responsible for all this destruction. Could not live with the fact she was now a complete and total failure in the eyes of her mother.

Helen was still standing there, reminding Ashley of the times she had come to her mother as a child, and her mothers embrace had dissolved every last shred of fear. Ashley longed for that now, for exactly that. Her mother to take her into her arms and drive all the fear and darkness away. She looked to her mother then. "Mum?" Was all she managed to say. But she couldn't stand to see the shame and fear in her mothers eyes. She knew in that moment, there was no other way. Her mother couldn't save her this time. She had to go. She had not expected to survive. Ashley Magnus should have died that night.

Ashley Magnus deserved to die. That was all there was to it. Such a person filled with so many evil inclinations, so many heinous crimes, a person who would allow herself to be captured, a traitor who turned on her own mother. There was no place in the world for a person like that. So she had left Ashley Magnus behind, left Ashley and everything Ashley cared about for dust. She had become a new person. A person so far removed from the person she had once been. And all she wanted was to be left alone in peace.

Darkness, like that which exists inside of her, was something that can never be truly tamed. Her father, of all people, should understand this. He who bequeathed his dark nature to her. He who himself lost control, killing innocent people. He, of all people, should understand the dangers. He, of all people, should not look to her with that disappointment in his eyes, as if he ever expected his daughter would amount to something more. He of all people shouldn't reach towards her as if Ashley Magnus can actually be resurrected from the darkness.

But reach towards her he does, grabbing her hands, pulling her close, and staring deeply into her eyes. And it stops her heart beating for a moment.

She wants to scream at him, at him and Magnus both, _'Aren't you my parents? Didn't you make me who I am today? There is no use blaming me.'_

But she holds her tongue. Her silence is unnerving him, she can tell. She tries to pull away, to throw him aside as the meaningless piece of rubbish he is. But he only holds her tighter. She is angry enough to fight him, to kill him, or die trying. Even though she knows it's not really him she is so angry with. She waits for him to tell her what a terrible daughter she is, how she broke her mothers heart. But he does not.

She looks to his eyes, she sees tears. He tells her "Ashley, your mother and I love you very much." He says it uncomfortably, but firmly. "No matter how far and fast you run away, you can never change that. You will always be our daughter."

With those strange words, he releases her from his grasp. And in a flash, he is gone.


	8. Chapter 8

This Chapter is for 'C_hocolate and Drama_' without whom the end to this story would not exist. Also for '_SparklySkater_' and one very insistent and demanding sharpie marker, and last but not least for each and every one of the fantastic people who have read the story and left so many encouraging reviews, you guys make my world go around :) Thank you so much to all of you :)

Chapter 8

Helen Magnus has only a vague recollection of Will leading her inside the house, and tucking her into bed. She remembers little else after drinking the tea which he all but forced down her throat. Too weary to protest, she allowed him to take her by the hand, footsteps echoing down the dark silent hallways.

When she wakes, hours late, her mind is hazy. It takes an inordinate amount of time for her to piece together what has happened. Will had slipped some sort of sedation into her tea. She wonders why she hadn't suspected sooner? The realisation she has been sedated should leave her feeling angry, violated. It only leaves her feeling dis-empowered. And exhausted. She closes her eyes and allows herself to surrender to the respite of sleep.

Some time later, Helen hears the door creak open. Without opening her eyes she imagines Ashley's small feet, her big round eyes, her trembling voice mumbling '_Mummy, I'm afraid.'_ She can almost feel the warmth of Ashley's soft skin as the child climbed into her embrace. She can almost feel the fear dissolve in an instant as she assures her young daughter there was nothing to be afraid of.

Helen doesn't open her eyes, because she knows it's not Ashley creeping in her bedroom door. She knows it's Will, or Henry, or Kate, or Big Guy. Coming to check up on her. And so she keeps her eyes firmly closed, her breathing steady, to let them believe she is sound asleep.

In the swirling drug induced haze in her mind, Helen allows her thought to drift to that place she never went. Her first born daughter. The child she gave birth to before Ashley. Many years before Ashley. The child who was old enough to be Ashley's mother by now, Helen realises. Helen had loved both of her daughters fiercely, and to the exclusion of all other. Helen had made every effort to be a good and loving mother. And yet both her daughters had now abandoned her, both had left her for dead. She had completely and utterly failed as a mother, twice, and that feeling sits uncomfortably with Helen Magnus. The fact that Ashley was in Australia could not be a co-incidence. Somehow Ashley had found her way to the much older sister that she never knew existed.

One week later..

Will finds Ashley on the rooftop of her apartment building in Australia. Sitting casually, with her legs dangling over the edge, head held high. Looking so much like her mother that it causes Will to stop dead in his tracks for a moment. He wonders what it is about the Magnus women that leads them to seek solace on the edge of extremely high buildings? He feels certain they do this just to make him uncomfortable.

He had followed Ashley home from the school she taught at. He watched her for hours. Watched her smiling down at the small children. Watched their little faces light up at Ashley's every word. Ashley was so composed, reserved. Unlike the Ashley he had known- reckless and impulsive. And yet she smiled genuinely at the children, her enjoyment of their company evident. Will found himself smiling too, it was hard not to smile around such happy children. It was hard to believe this young woman possessed so much love inside her for these small children, and yet no compassion what so ever for her mother.

Will wonders what Magnus would make of this sight? Her little girl, all grown up, responsible, happy, gentle and caring. Leading the way for future generations.

And just in the way her mother always did, just as he thought he was standing so still and unnoticed on that rooftop, Ashley's voice broke his train of thought.

"What do you want, Will?" She asks him, coldly, without turning around to face him "I saw you watching me at school."

"Your mother fired me." He answers. It's an out and out lie. He wonders if Magnus has even noticed his absence. Yet he finds the lie slips easily off his tongue as he speaks with Ashley.

Ashley wants to tell Will that it's not her damn problem But curiosity gets the better of her. "She fired you?" Ashley asks incredulously. "Her golden boy? But she loves _you_. You're not the one who is a bitter disappointment to her."

"You think you're a disappointment?" Will asks

"A dead daughter is pretty disappointing, you have to admit."

"But you're not dead, Ashley." Will points out her erroneous logic.

Shaking her head, refusing to admit he has beaten her, Ashley changes the subject. "What did you do to her? To make her fire you?"

"She's not the same person. Not since you left. Again." Will tells her, with unmistakable sadness in his voice. He is lying about being fired, but not lying about Magnus not being the same person. Will hated leaving Magnus at this time. But his powerlessness to help her was driving him insane. The only thing he could do for her was somehow sort out this whole Ashley mess.

Ashley doesn't hear the sadness in his tone. She hears only accusation. And it makes her snap. She stands to her feet to walk away, but Will is fast behind her.

"I don't think you realise the power you have Ashley, to damage the people who love you by your total rejection of them."

"So, she fired you because I'm a bitch?" Ashley asks sarcastically.

"She fired me because she is hurt, and angry. And because I kept the secret that you were alive from her. She doesn't trust me." Will explains.

"That was your choice, it's not my problem you kept it secret from her." Ashley shrugs her shoulders again, trying to dismiss him.

"You begged me." Will reminded her "Begged me not to tell her you were alive."

"I never begged you, for anything." Ashley insists adamantly. "I warned you that taking me back there was a mistake. You didn't listen. Because you were too stubborn to admit that someone else might know better than you."

"What's done is done, I cant change it now." Will concedes. It frustrates him that she isn't willing to take responsibility for the way she has hurt her mother. But pushing the issue isn't going to get him anywhere.

"What are you doing here, Will?" Ashley asks.

"I need somewhere to stay, I have no where to go. No job. No money." He admits pathetically, tilting his head slightly to one side and smiling his most charming smile to win her sympathy.

"Perhaps if you hadn't spent your last cent on an international flight to Australia, you wouldn't be in that predicament." Ashley points out.

"What's done is done, I can't change it now." Will repeats himself, much to Ashley's irritation. "Besides, I like it in Australia. I suppose you do to, Ashley? There must be some reason you came here?"

"Stop it." She demands. "Don't do that. Ever. Don't ever try to get inside my head."

"Just making conversation." He replies.

"Did she send you here?" Ashley hates herself for asking, but the words just fall out of her mouth before she can stop them.

"No." Will answers, honestly. Magnus had not sent him. He wished she had. It would seem more like something Magnus would do. Magnus hardly had the presence of mind to send Will to the shop for milk these days, let alone across the world in search of Ashley.

"You don't expect me to believe that, do you?" Ashley mocks.

"You don't want to believe it, Ashley, do you? Does it disappoint you? That Magnus hasn't come running after you?"

It alarms Ashley that Will has hit the nail on the head. She doesn't believe Magnus didn't send him. She doesn't want to believe it. Doesn't want to believe that her mother had really, finally, given up on her. Even though it's exactly what she thought she wanted.

Ashley pushes Will aside, making her way down the stairs into her apartment. Will only follows behind her. Ashley tries to slam the door before Will can get inside, but he jams his foot in the way preventing the door from closing.

"You're not really going to throw me out on the streets are you?" Will asks her.

Ashley only stares blankly at him. She is saved from answering him, by the voice behind her from inside the apartment.

"Have we got company, Simmone?" A woman's voice asks.

Will is momentarily confused by this woman's use of the name Simmone, he still can't quite equate that name with Ashley. Reluctantly Ashley steps aside, allowing Will to enter the apartment.

Will stands face to face with this other woman. An older woman. _A room mate?_ Will looks closely, looks twice, there is an unmistakable resemblance to Magnus. _A relative? _Magnus had never mentioned any relatives in Australia. Magnus had never mentioned any relatives at all come to think of it.


	9. Chapter 9

_It's been a long long time! This story would have been left unfinished without the fantastic nagging of 'chocolate and drama' and 'sparkly skater'! So if you like the updates, you have them to thank : ) And if you need some nagging done, I highly recommend those two! Out of gratitude I've borrowed their middle names for Helen's other daughter!! That's my way to say thank you :) _

_So these, chapters, and this whole fic, is for them :) It wouldn't exist without them. And a huge thank you for all the nagging and encouragement and inspiration and the massive amount of help with the story and plot. Couldnt have done it without you._

_Love you two, you guys just rock!! And a big thank you to everyone who had read and left such encouraging feedback. It means the world._

_Hope you enjoy, and sincere apologies for the terrible delay! Xoxox_

"This is an old colleague, Dr Zimmerman, and he is just leaving." Ashley hurries to tell the other woman.

"Leaving so soon, Dr Zimmerman? Shame, when you're such long way from home." The woman remarks.

The words echo in his head, the exact phrase Ashley had used with him. There was something so familiar about this woman. Some indefinable quality about this woman that just screamed _"Magnus"_ to him.

"And you are?" Will asks.

"How rude of me not to introduce myself. Kathryn Nicole Smith. The principle of the school where Simmone works. This is my apartment."

Will eyes her suspiciously as he shakes her hand, then he turns his head to Ashley. She is rolling her eyes in protest of the fact that Will has not left like she asked him to. But the protest is silent, and goes unseen by Kathryn.

" You must stay for dinner, at least? You're more than welcome." Kathryn states warmly.

"I'd love to." He answers, much to Ashley's chagrin.

"Come in, make yourself at home. It's nothing fancy, but it suits us, doesn't it Simmone?"

Ashley nods.

Will notices it as odd immediately that Ashley doesn't protest to Kathryn's suggestion the way he had been expecting her to. She doesn't argue or make excuses or try again to push him out the door. She passively accepts Kathryn's ruling that Will must stay for dinner. Undoubtedly she is displeased, but she doesn't fight it. It almost disappoints Will.

After Kathryn Smith has retreated into the Kitchen, Ashley pulls Will aside, whispering harshly "You can't stay here."

"I was invited by your....." Will doesn't know how to finish. Who is this Kathryn Smith? And couldn't she come up with a better alias than _Smith_?

"My flat mate, Will, and my boss. From my job. My nice normal job in the real world. You can't come here ranting about the sanctuary and abnormals. She will think you're insane. You'll find yourself locked up in a mental asylum, and it's probably where you belong too. You can't drag me back into that life, I belong here. This is my life now and there is no place for you, for my mother. Understand? You can't come here and screw things up for me. Please, leave." Ashley had began coldly, but there is a desperation in her voice by the time she has finished.

Moments go by before Will realises that Ashley has no clue this woman has any connection to her family. She is behaving as if this '_Kathryn Nicole Smith'_ is really just her boss, her flat mate. Just some random person she met, someone she doesn't know well, someone who doesn't know her. Will looks questioningly to Ashley "Ashley..." He begins

"Do not call me that!" She interrupts.

"You do know who that is?" He asks her, though he isn't sure how to finish. J_ust who is that?_ How is she connected to Magnus? To Ashely? Does Magnus know about this?

Before Ashley can answer him, Kathryn Nicole Smith has reappeared from the kitchen.

"Simmone, we need some groceries for dinner." She says.

Ashley surprises Will again. As just like that, without even being directly asked, she picks up her keys in preparation to head to the store. Ashley clearly isn't happy about leaving Will alone with this woman, but she gives in once again without protest.

"I'll be back soon." she says. But Kathryn has already disappeared back into the kitchen. She glares at Will, with daggers in her eyes, a silent warning for him to keep his mouth shut and not say anything to screw up the life she had built for herself. He nods in silent agreement to be on his best behaviour. But the minute Ashley is gone, Will heads straight into the kitchen in search of answers.

While he isn't sure what exactly he had been expecting from Kathryn Nicole Smith, he had not been expecting this. The sight of her standing, smiling coldly at him, undoubtedly lying in wait for him. With the incredibly sharp knife, glistening silver, pointed straight in his direction.


	10. Chapter 10

*_Still for chocolateanddrama and sparklyskater who totally rock! This fic is for you guys xoxox_

John Druitt feels decidedly unwelcome as he approaches the sanctuary. Unwelcome, and yet instinctively drawn, somehow at home. He feels, ironically, that he and Helen are close than they have been in years. That they had forged a connection searching for Ashley, losing Ashley, grieving Ashley, finding Ashley. His daughter. _Their daughter_. He was the only one who could come to understanding Helen's pain.

It alarms and surprises him to find Helen so shattered. To see that light fading from her eyes. If possible, she looked more distant, more broken, than when they had believed Ashley was dead. It was as if she had lost her in a more complete way. As if it hurt her more that Ashley was alive. Was out there. And, he supposed, that made some twisted kind of sense. In death, Ashley was still their Ashley. She was what she had always been, who she had been. There was come kind of comfort in loving her, remembering her, in believing in some kind of afterlife, some kind of reunion. Now, Ashley was a hostile stranger. They didn't know her at all anymore. She grew more distant every day, out there, far away, slipping further and further away from the person they had known.

The second thing that surprises John, is finding Will Zimmerman missing in action too. He had been led to believe that Helen and Will were close, were friends, were perhaps something more that that. It surprises him to find Will has abandoned Helen in her darkest hour of need. It surprises and delights him. Will Zimmerman is a representation of everything he despises, everything he himself is not, and he wonders if that was what attracted Helen to the idiotic young man in the first place?

John laughs to himself as he realises that Will has gone after Ashley. John knows better than that. Knows that no one can reach her, not right now. She is too stubborn. Too strong willed, determined. Whatever had happened, and he didn't understand the first thing about it, Ashley couldn't be reached. Not by him, not by Helen, then certainly not by Will Zimmerman. Will was only going to make a fool of himself. Let him try, let him fail. Let John be the one here comforting Helen in her hour of need. Together they would figure a way to save their child. He would be the one, not Will, to restore his family.

The only flaw in Johns plans is this- Helen doesn't seem to even notice him. He may as well be light years away. She is so unaware, unaffected, by the things around her. He has never seen her like this. And it causes his breath to catch in his throat. He has never felt so helpless, so useless. All he wants is to make her smile, and yet he can't. Because he isn't Ashley. And Ashley is the only person that Helen wants.

He had been expecting Helen's anger. Bitter seething rage. He deserved it. The look on Helens face, that moment, as Ashley begged him to take her away, as Ashley threw in her mother face "S_he kept me from you my whole life."_ Helen would see it as revenge, exactly that way. That he had not forgiven her for keeping Ashley from him, that he had taken Ashley away from her to spite her. That he was with Ashley when she was not. When the sad truth was that Ashley used him to get away, to get what she wanted, and then discarded him. Ashley had no time for him, she never had. She wanted him out of her life as much as she wanted Helen out. John had prepared all the ways he would explain this to Helen, to defend himself, to earn her forgiveness for being the one to take Ashley away again. He would explain that he had no choice. That she really wasn't Ashley in that moment, that the Ashley they knew was already gone and keeping her here was making it worse. It was making Ashley angry and bitter. And he had no power to refuse those pleading eyes of his little girl.

All of that was true, of course. And he had rehearsed it time and time again, the perfect way to say it, to make Helen believe it. And now it seemed he had only wasted his time. Because Helen did not ask for an explanation. She did not ask for anything. In fact she did not utter a word at all. She glanced up when she realised someone was standing in the doorway. That slight glimmer of hope in her eyes. John wondered who she was expecting? Who she was hoping for? Ashley? Will? Anyone but him? Then she turned her head away and had not acknowledged him since.


	11. Chapter 11

***_ For chocolateanddrama and sparklyskater who inspired the end to this story, xoxoxoxox you guys are totally awesome :)_

Helen Magnus is dimly aware of the absence of Will. She hadn't asked where he was going. She really didn't care. She didn't blame him for not wanting to stick around here. Let him fly away, free, like Ashley.

Helen is slightly more aware of the presence of John Druitt. Only because he is Ashley's father. Half of Ashley came from him. And she feels like her daughter is close to her when he is near. But she still refuses to acknowledge his presence by speaking to him, by even looking at him. She just does not care enough to engage in interaction with him, with anyone. So she shuts herself away in her mind, in a quiet dark place, punishing herself over and over for the mistakes she had made as a mother.

Despite the darkness she knew existed in John, she never doubted that he loved her once, or that he loved Ashley now. Of course he loved her, who could not? In his own deranged way, he had always loved her. Helen understood that. Despite everything between them, the madness, the darkness, Helen loved him too once, perhaps she still did. Ashley had been born out of that love. From that amazing brightness and passion, so it was natural that Ashley was extraordinary. Ashley exceeded her every expectation. There were things that worried her about her daughter, but never disappointed her. There were things that frightened her, but it was never Ashley herself who frightened her. It was the thought of something terrible befalling Ashley. Some horrific thing that she would be unable to protect Ashley from. She had never been afraid of Ashley, not in the way she had been afraid of Kathryn. Not until that moment she stood, pleading, face to face with someone who looked like Ashley, and yet had been turned into a remorseless killing machine. She had been afraid of Ashley in that moment, undoubtedly. But even then, she was more afraid of hurting Ashley, than she was of Ashley hurting her. And Helen knows she would rather have died in that moment than lifted a finger to harm her daughter.

Kathryn had been so different. Altogether different on every level that it was hard to believe she fell into that same category of 'daughter'. Helen had to remind herself that the poor girl never had much of a chance. It was tempting to blame the child, to claim that Kathryn was just bad. It was easy to lay the blame at the feet of the child's father. The child never had a hope with a father like that. But the truth is, half of that child came from Helen. Perhaps more than half, as Helen was the one who raised her, and the girl had never met her father. Helen was the one teaching her, loving her, trying so damn hard to love her. There was no one to blame for the way things turned out other then Helen herself. And yet it wasn't something she could control. It was just so different, the way she loved Kathryn, compared to the way she loved Ashley. And she can't blame herself or either child for that.

Helen tells herself that Kathryn pushed her away, Kathryn made it so hard to love her, to reach her. Kathryn made it impossible. But Kathryn was just a little girl. Ans Helen knows in her heart she drove the girl away. That she is the one who inadvertently kept the girl at arms length. She knows that the child only wanted her attention, her love. That child wanted things that Helen simply didn't have to give. Not back then. She was empty, hollow, void. The child was better off away, with people who could love her, give her a normal life and the things she deserved. People who didn't look at her and see only the evil penetrating eyes of her father staring back. So Helen told herself, it was for the child's own good that she was sent away. Though Helen could not deny the feeling of relief that flooded her when she realised she could no longer hear that voice crying out for her in the middle of the night. She no longer stood hour after hour rocking that crying child, completely inadequate to console her, that she no longer woke in her bed with those expectant needy eyes staring at her , that she no longer slept with one eye open wondering just what the girl was plotting now.

It hadn't been all bad. There were beautiful moments where she connected with her first born daughter. Fleeting shining moments. But they were just flickers in time. Seemingly insignificant amidst the turmoil, the chaos. Helen had loved her, had tried to love her, had loved her enough to let her go. For both their sakes. No matter how muddy her motives, she did believe it in the child's best interests at the time.

It doesn't occur to Helen for a moment that Kathryn would hurt Ashley. She isn't afraid for Ashley, not in the least. Kathryn wanted Ashley, Kathryn had always wanted Ashley. Helen remembers the day, when Ashley was just a small baby. Kathryn turned up unannounced on the doorstep. It had been years with no contact. Helen had a vague idea where Kathryn was living, she always kept an eye on her, from a distance. No matter how much the relationship had disintegrated over the years, Helen was still her mother. But Helen had not been expecting to see Kathryn again. Ever.

But there she was, that day, unannounced. She came inside, hesitantly stepping into the sanctuary that she had sworn never to set foot in again. She held Ashley in her arms, and Ashley smiled up at her.

"Let me take her." Kathryn said. "Away from all of this. This is no life for a child. I know what it's like being the daughter of Helen Magnus." The words were not cold or cruel. Just simple, heartfelt. And still, they slice through Helen's heart.

Helen looked at her daughters. Kathryn, all grown up. Alive and well and health and happy in spite of everything stacked against her from day one. And Ashley the precious little baby in her arms.

Instinctively Helen reached forth to take Ashley back in her arms. She didn't have to say the words aloud. Kathryn understood her. '_This baby is different. This daughter is different. I'm going to keep this one. I'm going to love this one. She's not like you.'_

There had been fire in Kathryn's eyes that day. Resentment and bitterness and betrayal. Years of unspoken anger. And yet, when Kathryn looked to that baby, her heart melted, her expression softened, there were tears glistening in her eyes as she kissed Ashley on the top of the head and gently stroked her hair saying goodbye. There was nothing but love in her eyes for that baby girl. There was a gentleness in her eldest daughter that Helen had not seen before. Ever. Some deeply hidden trait elicited by Ashley. Some place in Kathryn heart that Helen had never been able to reach, a place that Ashley could touch without even trying. And so Helen believes, unwaveringly, that if Ashley is with her older sister, she is at the very least safe. And perhaps, as Kathryn had told her all those years ago, far better off.


	12. Chapter 12

_AN: Hello out there if anyone is still reading this long ago abandoned story! Well it's only been 3 months or so since I updated this story, I'm the worlds worst updater, I know! This is thanks, once again, to the amazing 'chocolate&drama' and 'sparklyskater' and their persistent nagging, pestering and threats of attacks by vicious abnormals if I do not finish this story one day soon! (i mean to say the endearing encouragement and inspiration of the aforementioned individuals). All my love and thanks to my beloved naggers who also helped me write much of this chapter and helped me brainstorm ideas for the direction of the story, you guys rock my world xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox_

_**Chapter 12  
**_

She laughs ever so slightly. "Dear boy, do you not recognise a Magnus woman when you see one?" She asks.

He felt dizzy. _Magnus?_ As in, Helen Magnus? She seems able to read his thoughts.  
A twisted smile lights up her face as she turns the knife over playfully in her hands.

"Yes William, that Magnus. I am Kathryn Nicole Magnus. Ashley's sister. Whether older or younger, who can say? Conceived after, born before. Now why didn't your dear Helen say anything about me, even when she promised 'no secrets'? Why there are probably no records of me?"

"I don't know. He concedes. "Are you going to tell me?" He tries to keep a calm demeanour. He can not quite reach his weapon, and he is backed up against the kitchen counter with a mentally unstable woman who has a knife. And if she is the daughter of Helen Magnus, he is certain she knows how to use it.

If only Ashley were here. But would she save him? He isn't sure any more. He isn't sure of anything anymore.

"Yes." Kathryn answers brightly. "Because you are going to die today, I'm going to tell you everything. Dead men tell no tales, right?" She laughed a high, cold laugh. " I was a mistake, an even bigger one than Ashley! So scared, and too busy to raise a child, she simply could not be bothered with me. Gave me away for adoption before I was even 5 years old."

"So, who adopted you?" Ashley should be home soon. She will help him, won't she? He just has to keep Kathryn talking.

" Some silly worthless mortals." She waves her hand dismissively.

" And your father?" He asks.

" I'm never going to know, thanks to my heartless bitch of a mother. But probably some poor sap who only served to fill the lonely nights. " Her eyes turn suddenly dark with resentment. Even in his life-or -death situation, he can't help that his curiosity is sparked. Why did she hate Magnus so much? Once again, it is like she is able to read his mind, as she answers the unspoken question.

"I despise my mother because she abandoned me. Because I wasn't good enough for her, I was a mistake. No one can live up to her expectations, which is why I welcomed my dear sister with open arms. No one can live up to her standards, which is why you're out in the cold too, dear boy."

" That's a lie!" He snarls, loyalty rising in him, even though he probably should be agreeing with her if he wants to stay alive.

" What? So she really didn't fire you? I suppose that's alright, I can't be a shelter for all ex- proteges, now can I? I'd need a bigger house." She laughs eerily to herself.

"You're wrong. Ashley isn't a failure." Will insists.

" Really? I don't know, but I think a dead daughter is a failure."

" She is not-"

"Ashley Magnus is dead. The girl you are chasing is merely the empty shell. The poor girl, tossed out alone, changed almost beyond recognition, but still hunted by the people who are so thoroughly convinced she is the same. Do you really think she could go through all she did and not change? No, that's why she had to stay away. Because she was clever, and knew it would break her dear mummy's heart, having a broken toy she'd never be able to fix. Why she cares so much about you all is far beyond me. I don't care about you at all, which is why I'm going to kill you now. Simmone will be getting home soon, pity she bought groceries for three."

With those words, she lunges towards him, and he is barely able to get out of the way, his mind still reeling. Was she telling the truth? Was Ashley- Simmone- whoever, really gone?

"Please Kathryn..." He tries in vain to reason with her. "We can work this out. I'm not threat to you. I don't think it's necessary for you to kill me, let's talk."

She looks him in the eyes at that point. Years of betrayal and anger and pain evident in her stare. "This time, no one is going to take my sister from me, do you understand?"

With those final resolute words, she lunges towards Will with the knife.

Something is awakened in her as she approaches Kathryn's flat. That familiar instinct- danger. Something she has not felt since leaving the sanctuary. She quickens her pace as she nears the buildind, berating herself for leaving Will and Kathryn alone, it had been a bad bad bad idea.

When she enters she finds them struggling on the kitchen floor, knife in Kathryn's hand, Will trying to reach for his gun, which it appears has been knocked out of his grasp onto the kitchen floor.

Swiftly, instinctively, she reaches for the weapon, picking it up. The object is cool and familiar in her grasp. It makes her feel empowered. It makes her feel grounded. It makes her feel alive. She aims the weapon steadily in the general direction of the two of them, still struggling on the floor. Only after she has the weapon in her hands do they both turn to acknowledge her. They both jump instantly to their feet, but Kathryn does not drop the knife.

It is Kathryn who speaks first. "This so called friend of your just attacked me." She sobs in convincing tones of horror and distress.

"Come on Ashley, you know me better than that." Will is trying to plead with her. "That's an out and out lie!"

She looks from one, to the other. Searching their eyes. She can't make sense of it. She doesn't know who to believe. She looks to Will, he was annoying, very annoying, but to mount a vicious unprovoked attack on a virtual stranger? A school principal who posed no threat to him. That was astoundingly out of character.

She turns her gaze to Kathryn, and there is something familiar about her, something reassuring.

She doesn't find it difficult to come down on Kathryn's side. It's somehow incomprehensible to her that Kathryn would mount an attack on poor Will. Even though she has not known the woman long, she feels an innate sense of trust. She feels connected. Kathryn was the one person who made her feel that her world hadn't ended. The one person who made her feel understood. And she can not bring herself to believe her trust in the woman is misplaced

She is about to open her mouth, order will to leave. But he speaks first, "Ashley, you know me, listen to me, I have to tell you..."

Kathryn interrupts him before he can finish. "Ashley, kindly ask your friend to leave my house, or I will be forced to call the police." She punctuates her demand by slamming her free hand down on the kitchen counter.

Ashley stops still for a moment, starring at Kathryn. Kathryn does not realise what she has done. But it strikes Ashley as odd immediately, to hear her new-found friend, flat mate, employer, call her by her sanctuary name. And yet it rolls off the other woman's tongue so smoothly Not awkwardly like Simmone. It had been a reflex. Something Kathryn had not meant to do.

"What did you just call me?" Ashley utters softly...


	13. Chapter 13

_**Chapter 13**_

~~~_As always this is for, and inspired by, two very special people, C&D and SS- whom have kindly given their middle names for my villain in this story :) I have no words to explain how much their encouragement and support means to me. They are two truly exceptional people, who totally leave me for dust. Amazing people, amazing writers. Even though you live on the other side of the world, and we haven't spoken for a long time, I'll never forget you guys, and I hope you like these next chapters, they are for you. I am the worlds worst updater I know, and the worlds worst friend, But after trying (unsuccessfully) to make my way through Season 3 without our beloved Ashley, I felt the need to finish this story. I hope it might make you smile. Xo_ ~~~

Chapter 13. 

"You see?" Will hisses in smug tone. "She isn't who you think she is."

"Shut up." Both women snap at him, as he finds both the gun and the knife suddenly pointed in his direction. He backs up into the corner of the room. The resemblance between them was unmistakable. He wonders how he had not seen it sooner. They were different, sure. Much in the way he had found Ashley and Magnus strikingly different when he first encountered them. He recalls his shock to learn they were related. But in the heat of the moment, you could not deny it, that family resemblance. Right down to the way their fingers curled each around their own weapon, as the two woman stood, unshakable.

"Leave." Ashley orders him.

"But..." He protests.

"You heard her." Kathryn Nicole pipes up.

A wave of chivalry washes over him. He can not leave Ashley here, at the mercy of a crazy long lost Magnus relative. He inches towards Ashley, whispering in her ear that he cant leave her here all alone.

Ashley looks at him incredulously, it's Kathryn Nicole that breaks into laughter, although he does not know how she managed to hear his softly uttered comment to Ashley. "Dear boy, she can take care of herself, she doesn't need you."

"Leave." Ashley repeats.

And while he wants to be the hero, he knows deep down that Kathryn Nicole is right, Ashley can take care of herself better than anyone he knows.

"You know where to find me..." He begins, but Ashley slams the door shut in his face before he can finish the sentence.

There is silence for a moment, before Ashley turns to Kathryn.

"You called me ..that name." Ashley can't bring herself to say it.

"He was calling you that, I was lost in the conversations." Kathryn tries to sweep it all under the rug.

"Bullshit. It rolled off your tongue. Like you'd said it before. Like you knew me."

"Simmone, you're unsettled by your friends visit." Kathryn Nicole tries to placate her. But it works against her, she knows it instantly when she hears the hesitation in her own voice as the name _'Simmone_' slips out. It doesn't fit. It never has.

"Do you know how sick I am of being lied to?" The younger woman demands, slamming Kathryn up against the kitchen cabinet. Kathryn Nicole loses her grip on the knife and it clatters to the floor as Ashley presses the gun to her throat.

Kathryn had seen it coming, the angry onslaught, but she had no interest in fighting with Ashley. That was the old way of life, the old Ashley. Kathryn didn't _need_ a knife to control her young sister. It had never been her way.

"You're right." Kathryn concedes, in a calm voice. "I apologise. I should have told you the truth from the start." She doesn't doubt Ashley capable of violence, but knows full well she isn't going to pull that trigger until she hears the answers she seeks.

Ashley backs away, slightly, motioning with the gun for Kathryn to move to the lounge room. "Sit." Ashley orders her. "Speak."

Kathryn sits, calmly, slowly. "I apologise. I felt it best to use the name you introduced yourself with, I believed it was your wish, and so I have tried to call you Simmone."

"You work for my..." Ashley can't bring herself to say '_mother, my mother'_. "You work for... her." Ashley accuses. It all fits. Her mother, not able to let her be, has to have control, sent someone to watch over her. She doesn't doubt her mother power to do so, or her motivation.

"Her? I'm sorry, who?" Kathryn asks, feigning confusion.

"You know who I'm talking about." Ashley inches closer with the gun, Kathryn Nicole does not flinch.

"I'm afraid you've lost me. I work for the school board, as you well know."

"You work for...Helen." Ashley manages to say it aloud.

Kathryn laughs again. It irritates Ashley her this time. Laughing at Will, that was amusing. But her patience is wearing thin.

"Dear child." Kathryn begins, and there is tenderness in her tone. "If you are implying that I work for Helen Magnus, you are sorely mistaken, I assure you." Kathryn is almost offended by the implication. "Now, come, sit beside me, let's talk."

Ashley isn't quite buying it. "But you know ..her. You know me, you knew me. Before." Ashley pieces it together.

"Yes."

"And you never thought it was important to mention that?" Ashley demands.

"You never asked." Kathryn Nicole states simply.

Ashley studies the other woman's face. She can't place her. She has no memory of this person.

As if reading Ashley's mind, Kathryn explains, "You were very small. I'm sorry, what do you want me to call you?"

"Simmone." Ashley hisses through gritted teeth.

"You were very small when I last saw you, Simmone. I'm not surprised you don't recall." There is sadness in Kathryn's voice. Genuine grief.

"And my..." Ashley swallows hard, still not able to say the word aloud.

"Your mother?" Kathryn spits that word out, disgusted. "Well, I haven't had the pleasure in many many years."

Ashley squirms uncomfortably, while she feels distinctly separated from Helen Magnus, it doesn't sit right with her that she might have fallen prey to another one of her mother enemies. That she might be used as a pawn in some game.

Again, eerily, Kathryn answers the unspoken question. "Helen Magnus has taken more than enough away from me in my life time, destroyed my share of hopes, dreams. I assure you I have no interest in her, in the sanctuary, I want to be as far from that life as I can, that's all I ever wanted."

"But you have an '_interest_' in me?" Ashley asks.

"You came to me, Simmone." Kathryn Nicole reminds her. "I didn't seek you out."

"What do you want? What kind of game are you playing?" Ashley asks herself aloud, rather than expecting an answer.

"What I want, for you Simmone, is the same thing I wanted for myself. A normal life. Freedom to be whoever you want to be. Not having to answer to anyone."

"You want that for me because...?" Ashley isn't buying this. Not one word.

"You remind me so much of me." Kathryn muses. Ashley isn't certain if that's supposed to be the answer to the question, or if the other woman is lost in thought. Kathryn continues. "You're the one standing here, holding me at gun point. Leave if you want to leave, I'm not stopping you. I'm not the one that's tried to hold you back, tell you how to live your life, Simmone."

"And Will?" Ashley asks.

"Well I might have tried to scare him a teeny bit with the knife, but he is exceedingly annoying, and smug, he had it coming." Kathryn Nicole confesses.

Ashley relaxes her grip on the gun, looks to the door. Her exit. Sure, she could leave if she wanted to. She doesn't want to. She doesn't want to keep running. And for once in her life, she doesn't want to fight. She just wants everything to stop. She wants to start again. Clean slate. New Life.

It's tempting, to believe she can have it. To believe she can re-create herself. To believe Ashley Magnus, and the wake of destruction and disappointment caused by her, is buried distantly in the past. To believe its totally dissociated from her life. To believe she can go on, as someone other than Ashley Magnus, someone other than the failed daughter of the great Helen Magnus. To believe that, one day, as she fell asleep, she'd stop seeing the eyes of her mother haunting her dreams, she'd stop longing for that thing she desired which she would never admit aloud - For her mother to take her in her arms, make everything disappear, just hold her, just love her. Just like when she was small, when she believed her mother really could control everything in the entire world. And when she believed that she was the centre of her mothers universe, that she could do no wrong.

But none of those things are likely to happen, Ashley knows this. And she can not ever afford to let her guard down.

"Tell me, exactly, how you knew ..her. Everything. No more secrets." Ashley demands.

"You really want to waste our time talking about your mother, that's fine with me. But can we eat first? I'm starving." Kathryn Nicole responds.

Ashley gives a slight nod, and pockets the gun, not quite ready to discard it completely. Silently she follows Kathryn Nicole back into the kitchen.


	14. Chapter 14

(Forgive me, fans of Kate, but I just had to do it. Long live Ashley!)

_**Chapter 14. **_

Helen Magnus has a splitting headache. Exacerbated by the relentless banging on her office door, and the annoying girl shrieking her name. If she sits silently, perhaps the girl will go away. No such luck. Helen curses under her breath that she hadn't had the foresight to lock the door, as the door swings open and the girl, uninvited, walks through it. Helen surveys the girl standing before her. All she sees is a girl with not enough sense to leave her the hell alone. The others wouldn't dare come barging in here. That girl had a lot to learn.

"Hey, I've been trying to call you for hours." The girl states, sounding annoyed. As if she had any right to question the way Helen Magnus chose to spend her time.

"I've been busy." Helen answers, equally irritated.

"I can see that." Kate states, as she surveys the two solitary objects on the desk- the half empty bottle of wine, and the wine glass.

"Did you want something? Something worthy of disturbing me?" Helen demands coldly.

The girl is not put off by the unfriendly reception. "There's a problem with the security system." She explains.

"I strongly suggest you deal with it, then." Magnus answers.

"I don't know the code to reset..." Kate begins to explain her problem. Magnus doesn't care to hear the details.

"I suggest you ask Henry to deal with it if you don't know what you're doing." Magnus orders absent-mindedly.

"Henry isn't here, remember? Big shipment today. And with Will gone, we're a little short staffed. Frankly we could use your help, and you don't seem to have anything better to do if you don't mind me saying so."

The girl had nerve, Magnus would give her that. Magnus does not answer her, she watches, waits, for the girl to dig her own grave.

"Unless you're too busy sitting here feeling sorry for yourself?" Kate provokes her.

"I beg your pardon?" Magnus asks, a mixture of irritation and amusement in her voice.

"This is not like you, that's all I'm saying."

"And you've known me for so long, Kate." Comes the cold, sarcastic reply.

"I don't understand what the problem is." Kate says.

"Kindly leave my office." Magnus requests, politely.

"I was here, you know, just after Ashley...died." Kate begins.

Kate jumps in shock as Magnus slams the wind bottle on the desk, shattering it into pieces. "Do not, ever, speak her name. Do you understand me?"

"I actually don't understand." Kate continues bravely. "Even when you thought she was dead, you threw yourself into your work, got on with it."

The girl wont stop. Magnus stands from her desk, crossing the room to face the girl, towering over her. Even that doesn't seem to intimidate her.

"Look, your kid does not want to be here. She'll come home if and when she wants to. I'm sure Ashley can take care of herself. Life goes on, We need you."

"Didn't I tell you to NEVER say her name to me?" Magnus demands, her voice rising.

"Oh forgive me." Kate replies, raising her own voice "For daring to utter the precious name of that girl who can do no wrong."

"Lord knows you could never hold a candle to my daughter." Magnus answers back, spitefully. "Look at yourself, ignorant, opportunistic little brat, who thinks she knows everything."

"I'm a little brat?" Kate wants to know. "Funny that's exactly the word I'd use for your daughter, a spoiled little brat. Takes after her mother, no doubt." Kate hadn't meant this as an attack on Ashley's character, or on Magnus. But she, too, became defensive when being attacked, and quickly lost her temper. "At least I'm here, trying to keep the place together, while she runs off, Will runs off chasing her to the other side of the world, and you sit here drinking yourself into oblivion while the place falls apart around you!"

Before Magnus even realises what she's done, she feels the stinging pain in her hand, as she reaches out and slaps the girl across the face, hard. She regrets it instantly, as she sees the young girl's stricken face in front of her. None of this was Kate's fault. Attacking her did little to help the situation.

It's just, this girl, who wont stop pushing her, reminds her of Ashley in many ways. Petulant, disrespectful, wilful, stubborn, not afraid to speak her mind. That's what Helen can't stand about this girl, that she is somehow Ashley's replacement. And Helen doesn't want a replacement. She doesn't want anyone. She only wants her daughter back. The enormous gaping hole Ashley has left in her life is all consuming, she simply hasn't room any more to care about anyone else, not her patients, not her colleagues, not this girl in front of her who has always looked up to her. Magnus knows it's wrong, and selfish, and counter productive to continue on like this, but she feels powerless to do anything about it. She feels exhausted. Surely, she has suffered enough. Why continue on living like this? Forced to stare her failures in the face year after year, as her friends, her family, everyone she knows, disappears into death. And she is still here. Still alone. Still making the same old mistakes again and again. She feels entirely disconnected from her life, her work, her actions.

She tries, though, to make things right, mumbling an apology "I'm sorry, Kate, I didn't mean..."

Kate steps back, Magnus can't tell if she is afraid, or enraged. Silently the girl, who is not Ashley, leaves the room. And Helen Magnus is alone again.


	15. Chapter 15

_**Chapter 15**_

Will stumbles around outside in the dark, thinking things over. It was true, Ashley could care for herself. He figured that out the first day he met her. She left him for dust. The old Ashley that was, this person, he's not so sure. Does she know about that woman being her supposed sister? Why had she been horrified that the woman called her Ashley? Was it surprise, or anger, as if they had an agreement not to use the name?

He is startled out of his thoughts by the sound of soft footsteps. He spies a child, in the moonlight, heading for the door of Kathryn-Nicole Magnus/Smith's apartment.

"Hey." He whispers to the little girl in the darkness, without stopping to think it might spook her.

The girl stops, and turns to face him. "Yes?" She asks politely, her hand raised in mid air, as she had been about to knock on the door in front of her. Her golden hair shimmers in the moonlight, much like how he had pictured Ashley as a child.

"You can't go in there." He warns her. He thinks of the gun, the knife, the crazy lady inside. Leaving Ashley in there was one thing, but he could not stand by and watch a child walk into that.

"I have homework for Principal Smith. It's overdue." The girl explains, waving the papers in her other hand to show him.

"You can give it to her tomorrow, at School." Will suggest.

"No." The child tells him. "I don't think so." The child meets his gaze then, and there is something disturbing in her eyes. Something he can't quite make out in the dim moonlight. Something not quite right, not quite normal, not quite human. But such things no longer scare him.

He lunges towards her to grab her, but she has already knocked loudly on the door, and before he can pull the child away, he hears the door knob turning, and the door creaking open.

It's Ashley who answers the door. She sees the little girl first, and bends down to greet the child at her level. "Cadence, come in, it's cold outside."

The little girl steps inside "Thank you, Miss Jones" She answers.

_Jones?_ Will thinks to himself. _Kathryn-Nicole Smith_, and _Simmone Jones_? They could have used a little more imagination with their fake last names, he thinks.

Ashley does not notice him until she attempts to close the door, and his foot prevents it. She sighs wearily.

"I'm sorry." He begins, then hates himself for apologising. "But there is a child here, I had to make sure everything was ok."

"We don't need you to make sure everything is ok." She whispers to him, angrily.

"You might not need me, might think you don't, but that's a child. What is she, five years old?" He hisses.

"My name is Cadence." The little girl introduces herself, as she removes her coat and places it on the coat stand. "And I'm six and a half."

"There are lots of children around here, I told you, I'm a teacher, Kathryn is the school principal." Ashley reminds him. "It's hardly surprising." Ashley puts her arm protectively around the girl standing in front of her. Will can't tell if it's to protect the child from him, or if she is using the child to shield herself.

Something doesn't sit right about this, or about that child. She is eerily staring at Will. He can almost feel holes burning in his flesh from the intensity of her gaze.

"Who are you?" The little girl asks him.

"He is a very old friend, who is just leaving." Kathryn-Nicole answers from inside the house before Will has a chance.

"He doesn't look very old." Cadence states as she doesn't break her gaze with Will.

"Looks can be deceiving, little one." Kathryn tells the girl. "Come, show me your homework." As Kathryn ushers the little child into another room, she turns making some kind of hand signal towards Ashley, Ashley nods in reply.

"Ashely..." He begins

"Do not call me that." She tells him icily.

"This is crazy. What are you doing here?" He asks her, he looks at her, deep into her eyes, trying to reach her, to make sense of this.

"I don't answer to you, Will." She tells him. "I don't answer to anyone, anymore."

"Except Kathryn?" Will challenges her.

"I answer to no-one." She insists angrily.

"That is a child."He repeats.

"Are you implying that child in some sort of danger?" Ashley wants to know.

"Not five minutes ago, you were standing there with a gun pointed at me, that crazy woman had a knife, so no I'm not certain this is the right place for a child." He explains.

"You think I'd hurt a child? That I'd allow a child to be hurt? That's what you think of me?" She asks him. It horrifies her. But it makes sense. Why not? They all thought that, Magnus included. They all believed she was like her father, violent, dangerous, sadistic, evil.

"You said yourself, I don't know you any more. Give me one good reason why I should take your word for anything." He asks.

She doesn't have one good reason. She can tell him to leave her alone, that she's not his problem, that she can care for herself, make her own choices. That even if Kathryn wants to kill her, she doesn't really care, she doesn't want to be saved. She can tell him all that without flinching.

But to tell him to trust her, that she's capable and fit to ensure the safety of that little girl, of any child, of any person, she can't do it. She can't look him in the eye and say it. Not after the things she'd done. How she'd almost killed her own mother, destroyed the sanctuary and everyone in it, everyone she cared about. No, she can't expect him to take her word for anything. Let alone that innocent people are safe around her. And so, uncharacteristically, she does not fight, she does not argue, yell at him or take to her fists. She just leaves. Pushes past him in the doorway and vanishes into the night. So quickly, so unexpectedly, that it takes him a moment to realise what has happened.

Will had tried to catch Ashley in the dark streets, he had no success. She was too fast, she knew the neighbourhood, he did not. In any case, he didn't want to stray too far from the apartment, Ashley would come back at some point, surely. And the child was there. And the crazy Kathryn-Nicole.

He doesn't feel Ashley is in immediate danger, she is annoyed with him, and took off. And in any case, yes, she can take care of herself. Besides, she is the one who sent him packing in the first place. But there is something odd going on, Kathryn, that child. He doesn't like it. He doesn't know what to do, to protect Ashley, to protect the children. He is way way out of his depth.

He reaches for the phone, instinctively to call Magnus. He hesitates for a moment, she had not been herself since the Ashley business. But there is no one else to ask. About Kathryn-Nicole, her story about being a Magnus daughter, he had to go to the source. Magnus herself, knower of all things.

He rang her phone, three times, with no answer. Finally, he tries Henry. And when Henry answers, Will angrily demands "Hey, what's going on? No one will answer the phone."

"Where the hell are you?" Henry asks in reply.

"Australia." Will tells him.

"Dude, you didn't go after Ashley?" Henry asks hesitantly.

"I don't have time to talk about this with you, I need Magnus. Put her on the phone. Now."

"She told you to leave her alone." Henry continues.

_She who?_ Will wonders, Both Magnus and Ashley had told him the same thing, leave it alone. Leave everything alone.

"You don't understand, something strange is going on." Will explains.

"Whatever. Life here is strange. Ashley made her choice. Let it go, this isn't helping. You're needed you here." There is anger in Henry's words. Will senses it is related to the fact Ashley left him behind, abandoned him. But there isn't time now to go into it.

"Put Magnus on the damn phone!" Will demands.

He then hears muffed footsteps, voices, the unmistakable hesitation in Henry's voice as he calls Magnus by name.

"Yes Henry" She answers wearily.

"It's Will." Henry tells her.

"Yes Will?" Helen answers wearily into the phone.

"I need to speak to you. About Ashley." Will explains.

There is dead silence on the other end of the line.

"Magnus?" Will asks.

"Where are you?" She demands.

"Australia." Had she not figured that out in the days he had been gone? Hadn't anyone stopped to wonder where he was, to find out?

"Perfect, Will. The place falling apart at the seams, people are running off left right and centre to the other side of the world, just perfect."

"Magnus, it's important." He ignores the fact that she doesn't want to speak to him, least of all about Ashley, "There is a woman Ashley is with, her name is Kathryn-Nicole..."

"I know her name." Magnus interrupts her icily.

"Of course you do, you know everything" He mutters "The point is, I don't think Ashley is safe. And there are these children. Something is definitely …."

"You don't think Ashley is safe?" Magnus repeats sarcastically. "You think she was safe here? You think you are? Will, if you don't want to be here, at the Sanctuary, then don't bother coming back. No questions asked. No hard feelings."

"Magnus, No. That's not what..." He begins, but it's useless.

"You want to be safe, you and Ashley both? Good for you, run away, wherever, stay with her, both of you, I sincerely hope you're happy. But if you value your job here, be here. Tomorrow. There is a pile of paperwork on your desk. Kate has run off somewhere, I need you to find her or find someone to replace her. You will never mention that name to me again, you will never mention Ashley. I trust I've made myself clear.

She doesn't wait for his answer before hanging up. Let him leave her too, why not? Let them all live in their cosy little place on the other side of the world. She doesn't begrudge happiness to Will, or Ashley. They are better away from her, so be it. But she can't help the stab of pain that pierces through her every time she thinks about her daughter so far away from her.

With that, she pours herself another glass of wine, and closes her eyes.


End file.
